Reality Lives in the Moment

Photo by Charles Elliott

So often we wonder how we can change our reality when maybe the reality we want is right in front of us and we’d see it if we opened to the present moment.

Our minds are usually filled with, I have tos, I wish I hads, what ifs, etc. When are we present? Maybe we don’t like our lives because we fill them with so many thoughts about the past and future that we hardly know what the present looks like. What if we just stopped? Just stopped thinking, doing, moving. What would you notice?

Yesterday I visited Rose Hills Memorial Park. Not only is there nothing like a cemetery to put things into perspective, it’s also a very beautiful place. The roses are in full bloom and the graves are covered with Easter flowers and gifts to loved ones no longer sharing this moment in body. I visited the highest point where there stands an amazing Buddhist temple and cemetery. This temple, with Chinese Palace architecture, looks out over a green canyon and in the distance you can see downtown LA. I stood looking out over the green hills with the sounds of Buddhist chants in my ears and the wind or Spirit giving me goose bumps. My eyes, filled with tears, just took in what was right in front of them…reality.

We Paint Our World With Our Emotions

If I look closely I can see that what I’m thinking is being colored by what I’m feeling. Like right now, after reading an article in the paper about the Mayor’s Prayer Breakfast, I find myself thinking that not only is it exclusive, it is also very arrogant and self righteous (ok, I guess I don’t need to look to hard to see what I’m feeling). This prayer meeting included only readings from the Old and New Testaments and Christian prayers. I feel like saying, “How dare they!” Underneath that thought is, obviously, anger. I’m angry because I know there are others in the community who are not Christian, so this Mayor’s Prayer Breakfast excludes a number of people in the community. I’m one of the non-Christians, but I am very spiritual and so I’m hurt that they haven’t chosen a more inclusive program. If I let go of my emotions for a moment I can think of some positive things about the prayer breakfast. For me, it’s good to know that there is a spiritual component to the people in this town. Another good thing is that such a gathering is a way of creating community.

My emotions aren’t only a negative influence, though. I feel upset by this events exclusivity and so that leads me to thoughts about what such an event means in a diverse community. It leads me to wonder if it’s ok that this is a city council event. My emotions can stimulate thought, not just usurp it.

Our emotions add color to our lives. They can also be a guide as to what is really going on inside us. We may try to point to pure reasoning when it’s really emotion that is affecting our thoughts. For instance, people used to think that Africans were subhuman. They thought it was a perfectly logical conclusion, but it was a thought colored by fear. Look closely at what you think. Is there an emotion behind that thought that has created it? Is there any thinking really going on or is pure emotion being spewed. What is your reality and how are you coloring it? You can feel all you can feel, but learn to remain aware of those emotions and what they can do to our ability to think.

Writing Tip:

Knowing how our emotions affect us is also helpful when creating characters. The complexity of human emotion can be employed to create colorful characters and thereby, richer stories. Use books on character types to help you out. So get out your color palate and start layering on the hues.

Wake Up! And Tell Another Story

Alice: But I don't want to go among mad people.

Cheshire Cat: Oh, you can't help that. Most everyone's mad here.
[laughs maniacally; starts to disappear]

Cheshire Cat: You may have noticed that I'm not all there myself.

~Alice In Wonderland (1951)

What is madness? Is it simply another view of reality that differs from most? Is it that the mad see what most of us don’t? If so, then are most of us mad because we don’t see what those we classify as mad, see? We tend to call those who can’t cope in our shared reality (read: society) mad, but who’s to say that our shared reality isn’t some mad vision? Perhaps it is. Maybe those who can’t cope are made mad by this shared vision.

In the latest Alice in Wonderland movie, “Alice”, we see why the Mad Hatter may be mad. His world was destroyed in an instant. His perpetual tea party was a way of keeping some part of that lost world intact. When Alice arrives back in Wonderland after thirteen years, his tea party has deteriorated. His illusion is faltering. Is our illusion, our shared reality, faltering, too? It seems what once seemed to work, no longer does. The new Alice movie talks about making our own choices and not choosing what is dictated to us by society. Alice is more awake now, for this dream is no longer a dream and because she is awake she can direct the story as she wishes.

Perhaps we all need to wake up and realize we can tell another story. The illusion need not decay into a nightmare. We can live our dream and change our story if we don’t like what we are living right now. It’s still just a story we tell, but it can be a conscious one.

Do you like the story you’re living? If not, what story would you like to tell instead?

Weave a Better World by Living Your Bliss

“If we will not be marplots with our miserable interferences, the work, the society, letters, arts, science, religion of men would go on far better than now, and the Heaven predicted from the beginning of the world; and still predicted from the bottom of the heart, would organize itself, as do now the rose and the air and the sun.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

The world we weave would be a better place if we all followed our bliss; that which our very nature bids us to do. So often we choose to live our lives as we’ve been told we should or how we think we should, and not what would bring us contentment and joy.

Now it may seem that society is not very friendly to some of the things we would like to do for a living. So what! The world is not a better place, at the moment, for all our dutiful choices. I liken us all to a symphony, each person an individual musician who, by playing their instrument according to their particular part, brings a much needed piece to the whole. Together these individuals create a beautiful piece of music.

Play your part. Add your voice. I know you’ve heard this before, but are you doing it? Please do so if you’re not. I believe if we all do what is in our nature and be who we truly are that the world will be happier. How do you feel doing something you don’t like, lousy right? At some point you may begin to get sick. Maybe you get high blood pressure, weight gain, heart troubles, etc. from the stress of being someone you’re not. Now imagine thousands, even millions of people feeling this way. Yeah, you have our world as it stands now.

Choose to live your bliss. We all have some duties, but how we fulfill them is up to us. If you can’t rush out and live your dream right now, start following a path that will get you there. I’m finding my way back to my true self. Join me. Let’s make beautiful music together. Or in a textile metaphor: Let’s weave a tapestry so beautiful that we’ll wonder why we ever made anything else.

Are We Reflections of Reality?

Let me get all Platonic on you for a minute. Behind this piece of paper I’m writing on (I write in long hand first) is an idea of paper, or more accurately, an idea of a writing surface that manifests as a piece of paper. If I close my eyes I can picture many writing surfaces. Paper, chalk board, computer screen, etc. When I let go of those images and the words describing them, I’m left, supposedly, with an essence called writing surface. I’ve been practicing this. I’m still not quite sure I’m grasping what the essence is exactly, but I’m practicing.

So, if there are essences then I, this person named Joanne Elliott, am a reflection of something else. I’m ok with this. The more far out the thinking, the more ok I am with this notion.

So what the heck does all this mean you say? I can only tell you this: I’m not sure.

But I can see how to use this thinking exercise to talk about writing. The idea or ideas inside your mind are reflected in your writing. The stuff you get on paper is only a reflection of those original ideas. It’s near impossible to match those shimmering things inside our minds, but the words we write can still be beautiful. And so can life. The only perfection is in those essences behind everything, so don’t worry about it. Just write.

Through My Eyes Only….To See or Not to See

What’s real when we all have different perspectives? Is there some objective reality out there? And even if there is, does that matter since we each have our own view of reality?

Understanding that we have different perspectives seems especially pertinent when it comes to relationships. Let’s say Amy thinks Jim isn’t paying enough attention to her and Jim thinks they spend too much time together. What’s real? What would other people see? A friend might see that Jim is paying attention and tell Amy that maybe she’s wanting more than is reasonable. The friend might tell Amy to ask for what she thinks she needs instead of just being annoyed. Jim might see Amy as angry and cold. Amy is being cold because she’s hurt, and so tries to manipulate more attention from Jim, but that doesn’t seem to be working.

This is all too complex for me. So what is real, the friends more objective view? The friend’s view can’t be the whole story because they don’t get to see all that goes on between Amy and Jim. Jim and Amy’s views are a problem because their emotions blur their vision and make things even more complex. It’s a miracle we humans cope at all. But we do. We do because of our ability to imagine life from someone else’s perspective. This can open our eyes and clear our vision.

In the case of relationships maybe the question of reality doesn’t matter so much as being able to see through the eyes of the other. When we are open to other points of view, we are expanding our own. This expansion is also a part of a storyteller’s ability to create characters. So practice this in both your writing and in your life. I guarantee things will be less dramatic in your life and more dramatic in your works of art.

Mark My Words!

What do we mean when we say “mark my words?” We usually mean our words have communicated a truth about something that has yet to come to pass. We tend to be smug in our assertions about the future based on what we see or experience now. For example, let’s say the neighbor’s kid just hit you with a water balloon. In a huff you say: “That kid is going to be nothing but trouble when he grows up. You mark my words!” You are the all powerful seer and people should mark your words because they will be true someday. As much power as our words have, we are not all powerful, especially when it comes to other peoples’ lives or even the lives of the characters we create.

Of course, your words could have an effect if you actually said them to the kid. It gets messy when we use our words to try to change others, though. The opposite of what we want can happen and they may resent or blame us. The only person you can really change is yourself. And even then don’t be so smug as to mark your words for yourself. You’re an organic being, always in flux. Don’t tell yourself you’ll only be one way. If you think about it, you’re never exactly the way you were the day before. That’s great news! We can’t really be poured into some mold of our own or someone else’s creation and be permanently fixed forever in a certain form.

Remember, that I mentioned not marking your words about the characters you create? If you are going to tell a good story, your characters need to be allowed to take on a life of their own. Your character outline is not something you want to write in stone. As you write, your characters will surprise you. Let them. They may lead you to a better story or give you clues as to where you might want to take the plot next.

Be open to the creative process and to life. Things don’t work well boxed in and rarely do things go exactly how you thought they would. So relax, enjoy, and see what happens next.